Saturday, February 18, 2012

To Tell or Not Tell about Dissociative Identity Disorder

     I struggle with this so much.  Some of us want to keep it hidden to keep what is vulnerable safe.  Others feel uncomfortable keeping such a huge part of my life secret from people we care about or even people we are just meeting.  We want to share who and what we are openly and DID is a part of that.  We want to be able to freely talk about DID so it will not be a secret or a stigma.  But sometimes we may tell for the wrong reasons: we want things to be the way they were, we want to be validated by someone-anyone- or we may need someone to talk to and try to create someone who will listen by randomly picking them and disclosing that we have DID.  Sometimes we regret telling.  Sometimes we feel let down by the person's lack of response, negative response, or by our lack of 'feeling better' on hearing a supportive response.
     A big question we have is what to tell people when they ask what we are doing in or with our lives.  They obviously do not want a deeply personal or traumatic recounting and we don't necessarily want to give one, but I can't give any basic facts about my current life without somehow touching on deeply personal or traumatic topics.  I cannot think of any basic happy answers that would satisfy these people without flat out lying (which I hate, and suck at anyway), yet I do not want to stop talking to them or cut them out.  Every time I talk with them, that question will come up, spoken or unspoken.  They want to know what I am doing.  I have no idea what response to give them, but I want to touch base with them now and again and am starting to think that talking about the weather is not such a bad thing.

I Have Dissociative Identity Disorder: Disclosure DOs and DON’Ts by Holly Gray

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