Reading about the recent attacks in Norway I am reminded again that life is so very precious. What you do with it is so very precious. These reminders seem unnecessary, poignant, and more and more frequent. Our everyday lives ripped open to reveal the human soul in all its beauty and anguish that we had somehow forgotten about for more than a few seconds each day. I stopped at a report of this attack on my way to my blog, and the emotion and energy seeping from the article itself was overwhelming. Surely the world is grieving. It was the complete opposite of what I came to do: attempt to understand the world from an attacker's point view. Such a thing always seems unthinkable, the ultimate betrayal, and I am only strongly reminded of this but still know it is something that needs to be done, and is not yet done nearly enough.
As a victim of incest I am perhaps put in a different place than victims of other crimes because all the crimes done against me were interlaced with love. My love for them. Maybe because of that I am driven to understand evil, understand how anyone could commit evil, how they could be without conscience. I know that all the answers the world has given me to understand it is not enough. I know with every fiber of my being that every human being is good at their core. If I reach out to someone energetically, there are different levels to reach. There is a person's physical, their emotional, their mental. There is what they hide from everyone. Sometimes these layers are very deep. And under that, at the very core of them, I cannot even reach out to, because it is like trying to touch a supernova, it is so brilliant, so blinding and bright. Every person has this. Every person is a supernova. There are no exceptions. I know that no one is born evil, and no one commits evil without having first learned of it by having it committed against them. And finally I know that no person is ever beyond hope. I do not need the world to tell me these things. Perhaps since I have not yet heard it I need to tell the world these things.
As a victim of incest I am perhaps put in a different place than victims of other crimes because all the crimes done against me were interlaced with love. My love for them. Maybe because of that I am driven to understand evil, understand how anyone could commit evil, how they could be without conscience. I know that all the answers the world has given me to understand it is not enough. I know with every fiber of my being that every human being is good at their core. If I reach out to someone energetically, there are different levels to reach. There is a person's physical, their emotional, their mental. There is what they hide from everyone. Sometimes these layers are very deep. And under that, at the very core of them, I cannot even reach out to, because it is like trying to touch a supernova, it is so brilliant, so blinding and bright. Every person has this. Every person is a supernova. There are no exceptions. I know that no one is born evil, and no one commits evil without having first learned of it by having it committed against them. And finally I know that no person is ever beyond hope. I do not need the world to tell me these things. Perhaps since I have not yet heard it I need to tell the world these things.
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